11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength.

At times when I feel suffocated in the midst of having a life of 60% work, 20% church, 10% catch ups, 5% family, and another 5% to myself, I began missing those days where I could give myself some time away from this world and just occupying myself with things I loved to do. It's been 3 weeks since I've started working like a full timer in AIA, and things have been going pretty well, just the exhaustion I felt every single day, squeezing me dry spiritually and mentally whenever I reached home. Even though I clearly knew what God wants me to do, but the exhaustion came in and I couldn't help but ask God if I have been walking in the right direction that He is going, or have I already lost track along the way. Life seemed pretty normal, yet I was spiritually exhausted from battling with my own understanding and giving my full focus on God in the things I do. 

I was battling against the expectations surrounding me, while holding on to the calling I received and responded to. I feel lost along the way of letting go of my personal dream such as being rich at the age of 30, or how luxurious my life must be, because I no longer knew where I am going to end up in, but to be fully trusting in where God wants to put me in future- because He knows the best for me.