A powerful powerful time of worship during service yesterday. I was deeply convicted by God to anchor my hope in His truth and His promises carved for us because Jesus first came, to build that path of salvation for us. 

For the past week I have been dwelling in negativity and flooding my thoughts with lots of why why and more why. I saw a heart breaking truth of how others are dwelling in self-pity because of comparisons, because they think that others are better than them. Because of insecurities and fear. Such powerful lies from the devil, when he instilled a lie in our hearts 

"she/he is better than me, and I am useless". 

I realised that ever since I got a humble breakthrough from comparing myself with others, and developed a self comparison with God's standard and personality instead, I sometimes go back to comparing myself with others when the tinge of insecurity breaks into my heart. I saw the difference between comparing myself with God and comparing myself with other humans. I saw that fear, I saw that desire to want to be better. And I became more and more insecure, that I actually had a hard time going back to comparing myself with Godly standards again. I could understand how others feel when they poured out their jealousy for others, a heart breaking truth in the world today. I used to hate it when others compared with me, I hate it when others use me as a competitor because I felt that I have lost a friend because comparisons brings along an intimidating relationship that leads to more insecurity and fear that sets a barrier to true friendship. But yet through this lesson God reminded me that comparing imperfect humans with other imperfect humans, eventually leads to more imperfect flaws and scars in their heart which I got even more convicted to set my eyes focused on God. I was also reminded that because we cannot stop people from comparing with each other, what a Child of God can do, is to turn this negative comparison around into positive, to set a perfect example of Godly standards, that others can be drawn near to God. So that when others compared their happiness and their life with us, we can then declare the goodness of God in our life. 

Which I finally understood the word God spoke a month back: Contagious Growth.